


I'm In California Dreaming

by soakyourskin



Series: Tumblr Drabbles [7]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, M/M, Mutual Pining, Post-Zayn One Direction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-23
Updated: 2015-11-23
Packaged: 2018-05-03 02:13:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 595
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5272733
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/soakyourskin/pseuds/soakyourskin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Hey.”</p><p>Simple. But it’s enough to make his throat close up and it’s so simple is the thing, so easy the way he says it like everything, the past eight months, have all just been simple instead of being anything but.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm In California Dreaming

**Author's Note:**

> Because everyone knows that Hello was written for Zayn and Liam

“Hey.”

Simple. But it’s enough to make his throat close up and it’s so simple is the thing, so easy the way he says it like everything, the past eight months, have all just been simple instead of being anything but.

What does he say? What does he say to calm the burning slosh making its way into his veins? What can he say to silence the war raging on inside his head?

Simple.

“Hey,”

And it’s simple, should be, but the tremble in his voice gives way to the shaking of his knees.

“Are you busy?”

No.

Or, well—

He’s trying to be. Trying to keep busy, eyes flitting over blurring channels on the television, static far more interesting than the blondes and brunettes and the surprisingly occasional violets running about. He's trying to keep busy, he is. But he was failing before he even got the call, and even more so now that he's trying to steady the bruising pounding behind fragile bones.

So he says it.

 _No, of course not. Never too busy for you, Z_ , like he's done throughout the years, whenever Zayn found his way into Liam's bunk or bed at two in the morning, eyes red from lack of sleep, or too much crying. He says it the same way he has every time Zayn's asked for a moment alone to just be, with him, question in his eyes like Liam wouldn’t have said yes before the words were even out of his mouth.

It makes Zayn laugh now though because he remembers. His voice coming out distorted through the crackle of the call, odd sense of familiarity twinging painfully in the stiff of Liam's muscles at hearing it because it's still Zayn he's hearing but it's—it's foreign with months of distance and no calls, no texts, no talks. He doesn’t mind it though, laughing along. He doesn't mind so much when he feels it go steadier, the thrum of his heart.

It’s quiet for a while and he wonders if the slow pounding in his chest travels over the line, over to Zayn to hear.

“I wanted to explain,” unsure, and it makes Liam’s skin crawl with it. It makes him itch for a smoke, a blunt with Louis, a shot with Harry or just too many beers with Niall. It makes him want to claw at the uncertainty in Zayn's voice because he’d never been unsure with Liam, and it hurts to hear it now. “I want you to understand.”

And it's—why him? Why Liam, when Niall’s the one with all of the questions, Louis with all of the anger, Harry with all of the pressure to fill the in betweens?

Why Liam? Why him, when he’s always understood. When he all but waved Zayn off with a flag and a _good luck with your travels_ balloon the day he left. It was hard not to honestly. Hard to feel anything even remotely close to anger and resentment and bitterness at being left behind when they all felt the same way about this thing they've built five years of their lives on. When they all wanted out of these binding, choking, fucking rules. So—

“Why me?”

And it’s a simple enough question. It's harmless enough that whatever answer he gets shouldn’t hurt, shouldn’t make him feel more than he already does, confuse him more than he's ever been able to handle.

The rough of Zayn’s voice pierces through the speaker, and all but shatters him when it reaches.

“Because. It’s always been you, Li.”

Simple.


End file.
